Fellow men, shampoo is an everyday item, used by every family in the land. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Well, nearly every family. There\u2019s one household that doesn\u2019t use it, and they don\u2019t miss it. They don\u2019t miss the grunge and mould that it encourages on the shower glass, they don\u2019t miss the expense of it (can you believe the price of some shampoos?), they don\u2019t miss the fake, chemical-induced smell. They don\u2019t miss the ridiculous names\u2013\u2013\u2018sexy hair\u2019, for goodness sake. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
That household is me. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Let us travel back to quieter, gentler times; 1994 England. Guildford, Surrey, England, to be precise. I am a mature-age university student, not-hard-at-work studying psychology and sociology. Living on student loans, I discover the uni bar and fall into a serious relationship with Murphy\u2019s Irish Stout. This love affair keeps me impoverished, and some regular purchases have to be jettisoned. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Having previously fallen into a relationship with an expensive shampoo that supposedly revived your hair after it had been \u2018burnt out\u2019 by over-use of other shampoos, I decided to just wash my hair in water. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I also, at the same time, stopped visiting the expensive designer salon in Guildford\u2019s High Street, Toni & Guy, where a haircut was mortgage money. I sought out a men\u2019s barber and lowered my expectations, and to my delight got a better haircut for a tenth of the price. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Hairdressers across the land would be horrified at my decision\u2013\u2013they would argue that hair needs nurturing if one is to look one\u2019s best. And I agree, a good cut can do wonders for one\u2019s sex appeal. But the expensive cut only looks good for one day\u2013\u2013a good night\u2019s sleep and the ruffled, scraggy mop that greets you next morning is much harder to pull into line and have you turning heads at the office. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Back to the story. 1994. I am a frequent visitor to the uni bar and I don\u2019t have a girlfriend. I\u2019d like to think the two aren\u2019t mutually inclusive (correlation is not causation, as my psychology lecturers kept drumming into us) but I haven\u2019t yet managed to incorporate a girlfriend with a life that includes drinking strong alcohol. I\u2019m living and sleeping in the tiny room that all first year students at the University of Surrey get to inhabit and cram to the gunnels with text books, pot plants and posters. I\u2019m in my room crying, because the squeezed-out last of my shampoo got in my eyes. What can I say\u2013\u2013I\u2019m a delicate little flower with sensitive eyes. I\u2019m crying, I\u2019m cursing, I\u2019m carrying on like a pork chop. Standing there in my forest green M&S pure cotton dressing gown, I\u2019m still wet from the shower and feeling sorry for myself.\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I pop some Aphex Twin onto the CD player to calm my nerves, and wonderful ambient tones caress my ears and help soothe the Alpha Male savage beast that is me in my dreams. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
It was there and then that I vowed to not replace the shampoo bottle and instead begin my life of rebelliousness. I deliberately unhooked myself from corporate overlords and removed myself from the merry-go-round that is the personal care industry. An industry, let us not forget, that is valued\u2013\u2013in just Australia alone\u2013\u2013at US$3.73BN in 2020. There is a lot of corporate interest in fanning the human desire to shave, shower, and shampoo. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Now, I must clear the air here\u2013\u2013I am not some tree-hugging hippy who goes around in tie-dyed t-shirts, cargo shorts and Jesus sandals. Now retired, for many years I was a corporate consultant, travelling the world preaching the benefits of social media to curious CEOs and CMOs. I eschewed a suit for most of the time, but I shopped heavily at Gazman and had a wardrobe full of the obligatory IT staple, the black t-shirt. My initial decision to go shampoo-less was not some ideological stand, but merely pecuniary. It was shampoo versus Murphy\u2019s, and we can all guess how that was going to go. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
So, how has this shampoo-less life worked out for me? Well, I had thinning hair anyway, so don\u2019t look at my receding hair now and lay the blame at my decision to go with the Murphy\u2019s. My retiree\u2019s beard is thick and has never been touched by shampoo. I noted back in 1994 that my hair wasn\u2019t as fluffy after washing it with just water, but a Number Two haircut from my then barber John meant that a lack of fluffiness wasn\u2019t an issue for my otherwise devastating good looks. Ahem. I\u2019ve never been much of a Ladies Man, not being an Alpha, so I can\u2019t lay the blame for my lack of love life at the foot of my decision to eschew shampoo. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
You might ask, how much have I saved by not buying into the shampoo fantasy? Well, a quick look at Woolies\u2019 website suggests a bottle of shampoo can cost anywhere from $1.95 to $27.99. Let\u2019s pick a middle figure\u2013\u2013$10. My understanding is that salon-bought shampoo can be even more expensive. Let\u2019s also say a bottle lasts a month. That\u2019s $120 a year in savings. I don\u2019t remember what shampoo cost back in 1994, so let\u2019s be naughty and say it cost $10 also. Certainly, the shampoo I was using before I stopped being so gullible cost me around that amount, it was very expensive salon-sold hair product. Even the word \u2018product\u2019 gives you a clue as to how the hair industry views hair cleaning. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Nineteen ninety four is nearly forty years ago. Being totally disingenuous, forty years at $120 a year is nearly $5,000 dollars. I could have bought a cheap second-hand car for that. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
My hair doesn\u2019t smell like a wet Labrador, in case you were wondering, and none of my friends are any the wiser as to my hair maintenance and cleaning regime. Even my current barber Antonio hasn\u2019t commented or enquired, and trust me he is not shy in asking questions or giving his opinion! <\/p>\n\n\n\n
We humans have been living for many, many generations without the benefit of the personal care industry. We survived just fine. Would I commend my secret to others? Absolutely. Anything that loosens the grip the personal care industry has over us I am all for. I would argue that there is very little \u2018care\u2019 in personal care, and a heck of a lot of filler, desire and cynical marketing. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Go on, try it for yourself. <\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Fellow men, shampoo is an everyday item, used by every family in the land. Well, nearly every family. There\u2019s one household that doesn\u2019t use it, and they don\u2019t miss it. They don\u2019t miss the grunge and mould that it encourages on the shower glass, they don\u2019t miss the expense of it (can you believe the…<\/p>","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[3],"tags":[7,6],"ppma_author":[306],"class_list":["post-547","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-creative-writing","tag-mcw","tag-shampoo"],"yoast_head":"\n